The Death of Natural Beauty

The Death of Natural Beauty

I wrote about a month ago then shelved it immediately. Because god, this isn't in form at all.
There are exactly two ways I could make this work in my writing style. Way one: I needed to be properly invested in exploring the character. But the Fleur I had made was absolutely nasty, and I wasn't skilled enough to save her from  it. Way two: I needed to be intensely interested in the modeling world, and wanting to share what I learned about it through the story. But while I have interests in fashion... I have no interest in modeling, and that disinterest is incredibly clear in how vaguely I hint to it.

So this turned out to be is a decent story, but it lacks in detail, in verisimilitude and honesty. Its trashy and cheap, and proof that I really shouldn't write about things I don't want to get too heavily invested in. I fixed it up, and its certainly readable but... I dunno if I want to submit this to EqD. I'm certain I could manage to get it through, but it doesn't have my flair. It doesn't have anything I strive for in my writing.

I'm glad I wrote it though. Ideas always bug me until I put them on paper, and I think this was a pretty good idea. The execution though... it's just meh.

The Steadfast Sky 11 & 12

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Like I said... I think I got a grasp on how to push Discord's development in the right direction. Important direction being the ego boosting one.
As for Chapter 12... It was so easy, and so much fun to write. Yet it's one of those chapters that would have been alright from any perspective...
I'm sorry Celestia! You'll get a chapter of inner reflection next week! you're still my favorite pony, I swear!

S2 ep15: ...

Y'know, why do I even write these episode response blog posts? I really have nothing more to say than a comment or two, and...

...and I'll be right back. I have to write ALL THE FANFICTION.

So weird...

I didn't think it would be weird writing fanfiction. But it's weird. Really, really weird. Its weird investing so much time into thinking about a world and how you see it, then looking at a dozen other works that both come so close, or see it so radically different. It's weird going over the canon again and seeing where people took things, what they thought was important, and building from there.

I took dozens of notes about canon Discord, re-watching the episodes and trying to sketch a rough personality. Trying to simplify it to make an 'innocent' version. I think for the first ten chapters, I may have made him too innocent... he wasn't Discord-y yet. I thought of him as a quietly observing animal... strange and bizarre, yet intelligent and cuddly. I took too much out of the original, put too much of my own ideas in. Comparing him to some other interpretations, the Draconequus I build was almost washed out.

But I think in chapter eleven I've finally got a hold of 'my' version of Discord. Closer to the original, but different in the ways I intend him to be. I think I've really grasped who he is in Steadfast Sky, and what it eventually leads to. I don't regret the groundwork I laid, but I think it's for the best to let 'my' Discord move beyond it.

Chapters Eleven and Twelve should be up around Saturday. Been thinking of making that my schedule, two chapters every weekend. We'll see!

S2 Ep14 : The Last Roundup

This is about my reaction

This was just a great episode overall though, lots of funny stuff! Pinkie Pie going crazy is also getting a lot of attention, but I think my third favorite scene would have to be the one with the mailman at the surprise party.

But the Derpy Revelation is really all that's going to be talked about for a while, because it is a pretty big deal.

The Steadfast Sky 9 & 10

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

School is one reason why this took forever. Another reason was general panic about voice and pacing.

Because I've just realized that no one teaches how to write a serial story. Because those kinds of written stories are never published. I'll probably keep tweaking these two over the next couple days... just word choices and such.

Anyway, I've got a good chunk of 11 done, and a good idea for 12, so those should come together over the next week.

Moonstuck

Oh my god I think I just died from adorable

Sudden Realization: Wait a Minute

I have realized something life changing and mindblowing.

I don't read stories for plot. Screw plot. All plot has been done already and everything unique idea has already been made trivial in turn.

I read stories for the style. I read stories for the methods of telling. An interesting voice is far more fascinating than a billion clever twists.

Also, Lilith's Brood sucks.

and i may have a fever

*eats a hostess cupcake*

Good Reads : Eternal

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Oh Twilestia, will you ever stop being the One True Pairing? No, you never will, because I love you. Although I'm not sure if this is meant to be shipping or not. It's not marked as such on EqD, but that was probably the wisest choice ever. Shipping fics get vote bombed to hell on that site...

I've noticed a pattern with fanfiction that I want to share with myself in the future: No story ever, ever starts well. Ever. Maybe its because the author is still getting a hold of the work and gets into their groove later, or maybe everyone over thinks the beginning to the point where it becomes an overworked mess. But this story is no exception. Worse, because there's nothing obviously bad about it. Each scene in its own right could be a very powerful, effective summary of Celestia's current feelings before moving on. But that same scene is essentially repeated five or six times before moving on.

But once the story gets beyond that point, its actually a very entertaining. I got very caught up in the events, and I could easily call it a page turner. I got to the end and immediately wished there was more to read. What happens next?

But I don't know... since its so good, am I thinking too hard about how it could be better? Am I holding it to different standards because it's good enough to be considered in one of my workshops? Reading it, something felt missing. It needed some severe scene editing, a quicker pace, less repeated feelings and more exploritive description...

Plus, I cant help but compare it to Sunset Looms. He's looking at it more like Twilight's suffered and been unable to move on, but the story is so firmly rooted in Celestia's mind...

I dunno what to think about this story, but I recommend it.

Score: Five EqD stars and a bookmark

S2 Ep13 : Babycakes

I laughed here and there, but I was pretty much was unimpressed with this episode. There were a few world logic things that bugged me, but more than that, it was just an okay episode. Nothing really special about it.

What's more entertaining is the comment section on EqD. It is exploding into a civil and intelligent flame war between people who give lists about how the episode was not up to par, and people who roll their eyes and tell everyone to stop nitpicking because they clearly have too high of standards. Can't we just admit that not every episode is awesome in peace? Can't people handle the fact that some strangers have different tastes? When will we stop bringing out the tea and crumpets and speaking in slightly raised, yet polite voices about equally valid opinions?

The humanity! The horrible, horrible humanity!

The Steadfast Sky 6, 7, & 8

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Man, this is crazy fun to write. Guess that's part one down! I wrote 19000 words in what, ten days?

Yeesh. I should have done this for NaNoWriMo.

Dunno if I'll be able to keep up this speed, since the next semester starts Monday and my year is busy as hell. But I'll do my best, woo!

Art: Equestria Mock War Day 1

I need practice drawing ponies. So an event came up on EqD where you draw ponies. Good deal.
Today's theme was "Pony Armor"

I like how the colors turned out. I tend to be bad at those.
But this picture is gawd awful.
The line work.... it's so shoddy... aug.

Art: Human Lil Discord

When I'm writing, sometimes all I can see is human characters, so I thought I'd draw human Discord. As a lil guy. Looks more like a lil punk than anything...
Also, tried out colored lines instead of straight black. It definitely is... different. A thing.
I like how this turned out.

The Steadfast Sky 4 & 5

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

I am more than a little bit worried.... these two chapters are mostly set-up for later, Luna wont be narrator until chapter 7, the pacing is all funny and worry worry worry. I know if I brought this in front of workshop they'd bring out the switchblades.

Though I guess I shouldnt be surprised that the pacing is funny to me. With Sunset Looms I very clearly and strictly outlined each chapter before I even attempted to start drafting. Here I'm just writing, and letting the events and developments flow out of each character's personality.

And Celestia... she is a teller, that one....

Anyway, the story should be up on EqD in the next couple of days.

S2 Ep12 : Family Appreciation Day

Not the funniest episode, but the world building! Sweet, sweet world building.

Also, why is Equestria so empty, with so many settlers all over the place? Its been around for what, over a thousand years? Ponies havnt taken over everything yet? Or do they not have other groups to contend with, besides the one issue with the buffalo?

No clue. Time for FANFICTION!!!

Good Reads: Through the Eyes of Another Pony

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This story has no right to be good. No, it had no reason to be good.

This is what I'm going to point to when people dont beleive you can write a good story out of the crappiest of fanfiction. "OMG I'm a pony and I'm in Equestria"? That is the absolute worst, most mastubatory topic you can ever think of.
Worse, it does every. Single. Self-indulgent thing that you expect from these fanfics. Name a thing, it does it. It almost makes me think this was written on a dare, this good of a writer can't NOT be aware of all the terrible self-insert tropes he's bringing up.
And thats the thing. It's good. Better than good. This is the best writing I have ever encountered in a fanfiction. This is better than writing I've encountered in college workshops. Its better than some of the crappier books I've read. The only complaints I could give would be ones I'd direct at a professional work, which isnt entirely fair. I'd say none of the ponies or locations feel like they're fleshed out or explained, but its frikkin fanfiction, you know who these ponies are! You know what Ponyville looks like! Shut up!

The only real, non-professional issue I could bring up is that the guy can't write danger well, but who gives a crap? Thats not the focus of the story. The focus of the story is the beleiveable and entertaining response to arriving in Equestria as a super pony marty stu. Hell, if you're going to self-insert, go all the way, am I right?
But the guy is just so damn charasmatic. And not in the telling 'by the way, this guy, he was so charasmatic. he had all the smooth moves' kind of way. In the kind of way that you write a good, believable, flawed, complicated person, and so convinced of his reality, you admit to yourself that he's a real fictional being, and think that he's charismatic to yourself afterwards.

This story gives me renewed hope for fanfiction and its writers. There are people who know what makes a character, and writing itself, interesting.

Score: If I could write like that, I could call myself an author.

The Steadfast Sky

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

I wrote this all as one chapter originally, then realized that it was actually kindve long.

Also, it took forever to get Luna's voice right.

But I think this turned out well.

I feel like I had more to say! I guess, thank everyone for reading! XD

Editing: Pale Cocoon

Apparently I edit fanfic now. Huh. I hope this doesnt become a super regular thing, I'd probably murder the crap out of budding artists. I have zero places to hide those bodies now.

Anyway.

I helped writer Inky Notebook spruce up a crossover one shot, Pale Cocoon. It wasn't exactly planned, but I was glad to lend a hoof to a brony in need. Plus, the fic introduced me to a great anime short of the same name. Look it up on Crunchy Roll, its got a good atmosphere about it, which the fic tries to replicate. I think by the end the writer gets a hold of it.
Yeah, its a copy/paste plot but with ponies, but the goal was to replicate the emotions of the original in written form, and introduce fellow bronies to a great short work. I believe she succeeded at that.

Good Reads: My Little Chrono: Triggers are Magic

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I dont have much to say about this one, but I'm reading it to the end, so I thought I'd write a quick review.

This story is like eating popcorn. Each chapter goes by quick and is individually entertaining. It’s nothing super substantial or weighty, it’s just a bit of fun to see which ponies play what roles, and how they affect the story.

I have no clue how this must read to someone who never played Chrono Trigger, but for those who havnt, the Mane cast feels written properly, no, actually, more than that. They're entertaining and enjoyable. Just as fun as the show. Better even, in some cases. I really dont like Rainbow Dash in the show, but she's written here as I feel she should be: mostly self-concerned, but fiercely loyal to her friends, trying as hard as she can to protect them. Also, actually badass. If one's not familiar with Chrono Trigger, I'd recommend this story just to read the Mane 6's antics.

The writing style is the only thing I've got to bang on about, as I tend to do. Some of the emotions are summarized and writing clichés come close to being overused, but the style is serviceable. It says what it wants to say, and the departures from the original game mostly add to the story instead of detracting from it. I mean, a couple of scenes really didnt need to be in there, like Firefly arguing about food shortages. But its easy enough to gloss over the boring parts. Individual scenes are very clearly separated by large dividers, and if you already know the story of Chrono Trigger, it doesnt depart enough to leave you confused.

And another thing... This was a bonus to me, but I dunno, some people might find it off-putting. Combat is very bloodless. Rainbow Dash cuts and slashes and the peoples fall down without much of a fuss. Its something I havnt seen in a while, in both fanfiction and published works, and I greatly appreciated the writer's restraint.

Score: This popcorn is the movie butter kind! Yay!